How do I tell my roommate their partner is staying over too much?
A guest who stays most nights is living there without paying or agreeing to the house rules. Naming how often, and what you need, keeps it practical.
Tonecraft lets you rehearse it first. Describe what is happening, choose gentle, direct or firm, and walk through six turns. At each turn you see three ways they might answer.
Three ways to open
Gentle
Can we talk about evenings? I like your partner, and having them here most nights is more than I signed up for. Could we agree on a few nights a week?
Direct
Your partner is staying over most nights. I need that to be a couple of nights a week, or for them to pay a share of the bills.
Firm
Your partner staying here most nights isn't working for me. It needs to be two nights a week at most.
What to expect
Three ways they might answer. Each is plausible, not a prediction of what they will say.
Hears you out
Fair. I hadn't counted. Let's say weekends.
Pushes back
They're barely here, and they clean up after themselves.
Brushes it off
It's not a big deal. You're overthinking it.
A message to send after
Edit it to fit, then send it yourself
Rehearse this with your details
Thanks for talking it through. To confirm: two nights a week, and we look at it again next month if it's not working.
Your first five rehearsals are free. No card needed.